Our Journey to Baby H 🌻
Our Journey to Baby H 🌻
83Days to go
Carlye Hoefs is organizing this fundraiser.
We are Ben and Carlye – We have been on our journey to parenthood for 5 and a half years with added love and an extra helping heart of our Gestational Carrier and her family.
We’ve decided that after 5 and a half years, it is our time to share our story with the world and to help bring more awareness of infertility and less traditional pregnancies to light.
I (Carlye) was born in 1991 with a Congenital Heart Defect (CHD) – Tricuspid Atresia. Since then, I have had 5 open heart surgeries: Main pulmonary artery banding (1991), Bidirectional Glenn (1993), Fenestrated lateral tunnel Fontan procedure (1996), epicardial dual-chamber pacemaker for sinus node dysfunction (2011), and a Cardiac ablation (2015). Due to my CHD, we set out to find a Gestational Carrier help us fulfill our dream to become parents. We are so thankful that we found our Earth-Side Angel two years ago. Since then, we have done 2 egg retrievals which has yielded in 16 eggs retrieved with 1 Euploid Embryo ready for transfer!
Our Carrier has been a rockstar. She’s attended all necessary appointments, has gone through a number of blood draws and ultrasounds, and did 45 days of medication leading up to our first transfer. Our Transfer date was set for Thursday, October 20th, 2022; everything went *perfectly* and then we did everything we could to pass the time of the dread 9 day wait. On October 29th, 2022 our Carrier went in for her BETA blood draw and we got the news that we were pregnant with an HCG level of 92.5. The excitement we felt that day was through the roof and a feeling that we will never forget. It was so heartwarming and blissful; we felt on top of the world. 48 hours later our Carrier went in for the second HCG draw, unfortunately, results came back at 115. That was the day we felt our world fall down around us. Immediately, we could feel that joy wash away. Our one chance at a baby was over faster than we ever could’ve imagined.
Knowing that joy we felt on the day of transfer and after – we are dreaming of feeling those feelings again. Unfortunately, IVF, pregnancy with a Gestational Carrier, gaining legal documents, and other Infertility treatments are still “so new” in our society and to insurance companies (so they say). There is limited information, limited services, and insurance companies like to claim that “it’s your choice.” More than anything, we are choosing to share our story to help change the stigma of infertility, fighting for our future, and to anyone else going through a similar journey.
In addition to my CHD, I have “Diminished Ovarian Reserve” The definition for Diminished Ovarian Reserve states “Diminished ovarian reserve is the loss of normal reproductive potential in the ovaries due to a lower count or quality of the remaining eggs.
Normal aging causes most cases of diminished ovarian reserve but genetic defects, aggressive medical treatments that harm the reproductive system (radiation for cancer), some surgeries and injury can cause DOR as well. In many cases there is no apparent cause for a relative decrease in ovarian reserve.” (fertility.womenandinfants.org)
In order to move forward, we are needing to do a 3rd egg retrieval. This egg retrieval will take place at Mayo Clinic to help ensure that we are in the best care. The egg retrieval process with PGT-A testing and getting ready for a transfer will take about 3 months. We are excited to try again to see if we can get closer to our dreams of being parents. If you are looking to donate, or share our story please know that we are forever grateful for you. If you wish to join our Facebook page for complete details and updates, please join here: https://fb.me/g/p_UvPhUjWBmC2pv1cd/fJnB0gZV
“Sometimes when making something so precious and beautiful, it takes an extra helping heart”
Ben and Carlye