Expanding The Adams Family
Expanding The Adams Family
354Days to go
Mysti Adams is organizing this fundraiser.
Welcome to Expanding the Adams Family Fundraiser!!! We are The Adams Family: Robert and Mysti Adams.
We have been married for 15 years and counting! Robert is a Massachusetts born native with a love of outdoor recreation, all things video games and a funny accent. Mysti is born and bred Texan that says y’all way too much, hates wearing shoes and loves all things crafting. Together we make a weird Southern New England family with a handful of fur babies: Banshee (cat, 12), Jaxon (dog, 11) and Dexter (cat, 5). We love adventuring the world, learning new things, playing Pokémon go, crafting, gardening and are total FOODIES! We are just a married couple in love wanted to expand our family. We have been actively trying to conceive since 2016 however knew we would most likely have struggles conceiving when Mysti was diagnosis with Arthritis her junior year of high school (2006). The medications are NOT safe to even try to get pregnant, trying to conceive needed to be coordinated. We knew we needed medical assistance/intervention from the get go. There have been a tons of road blocks for us and we have been pushing through them.
We are running full steam ahead into our IVF Journey and expanding our family with a local IVF Clinic. Family & friends have begun to inquired where we are in the “baby making” process and how the journey is going. Originally, we were not planning on sharing the IVF process and our journey until I found myself copying and pasting info, trying to share knowledge, data-based research and just where we are in the timeline with family, friends, others and even strangers. This has led into the typical questions asking why isn’t insurance helping, how we are funding this journey, fostering, adoption, fundraiser links and how they can help support us?
Military Insurance: Tricare does not offer any non “natural conception” AKA only Timed Intercourse methods. Tricare will only cover Infertility Diagnostics & Correction Treatments. They will not offer any support with Assisted Reproduction such as IUI, IVF, Surrogacy & Fertility Preservation.
A supplemental policy via the Insurance is not required to be offered for fertility/ advanced conception method coverage. There are only 19 mandated states that offer any sort of coverage while we don’t live in any of the designated states; they can be an additional expense and extremely costly. Along with the legal loopholes the insurance companies have found to purposely exclude the TTC and Infertility Communities.
While fostering is a personal long-term goal. It is not the right time or situation for us CURRENTLY. The whole mission of fostering is for Family Reunification. Period. While there’s short term and long-term fostering both a meant for Family Reunification. There’s tons of pros and cons, hoops & feelings and a lot of money with for fostering short or long term. Eventually, we will be doing this post military career to help the system to reunify families back together and have a small chance of adding to our family when and if the right time is presented.
Private Adoption is also a long-term goal that is never ruled out. However, the process is also a long and daunting process. The astronomical pricing and lack of transparency with companies, the agency fees and order of operations leads this road to be ruled out for us, for now. When companies stop nickel & diming humans for trying to expand their families then maybe we will consider this. (National Average price: $25,000-$45,000: Lean more to the higher end)
Most will utilize credit cards, personal loans, fundraising, yard sale, cost cutting, downsizing and general stuffing the savings. With advancements and transparency in the medical/ financial industries patients can now finance their funding via medical loans. There are many benefits to utilizing a medical loan versus a personal loan: better rates, no collateral needed, can add medications, additional retrievals and embryo transfers into one lump sum and various mics expenses. With medical reform, low-cost clinics and advocating for financial transparency this has streamlined the process which has given countless families another option to utilize when trying to fund their journey.
While the major moving parts have been taken care of the medical loan industry cannot roll all expenses into the loan and we now must pay the Cash Required Expenses that need to be paid up front such as: HSG procedure, carrier screening, anesthesia, PGT-A Biopsy testing, per embryo + shipping biopsy sample to testing facility and FDA testing for potential surrogacy needs to be done at egg retrieval. There are a lot of moving parts, people and companies involved to help the creation of families and can take years and years to navigate with outcomes being in all variations.
Many have inquired on how to help and if we are fundraising. While at first we didn’t want to ask others to help us expand our family; the majority wanted to still help. After a lot of discussion and research we found this fundraising website that is solely for the infertility community and actively does grant giveaways monthly. This website is worth supporting for our Infertility/TTC community. Now that we decided to support this particular fundraising website along with sharing our story, we are rethinking of a way to honor those who want to monetarily help and support us through this journey as a way to thank and celebrate those who have contributed to expanding our family for all our future children since we will need IVF for any biological children, possible surrogacy is still an open option, and adoption is always in the plan for long term and short-term fostering.
We have been planning & designing a quilt for Baby Adams that will be measured, cut, pinned and sewn together by Bobby and I. We have been reworking the concept so others who are wanting to help financially can be honored in this blanket as well. We want all of our children to see and feel the love that went into creating them. This blanket would be presented at the baby shower (when applicable) so Baby Adams will have a forever memento to grow up with.
How it works:
We have designed a Quilt out of squares and designated $ amounts to each square.
• As we raised the funds, we will mark off a square. (We are also having yard sales and downsizing)
• Donate to Our Fundraiser any dollar amount you would like
• Message us with your address and what name you would like to be included on the BACK OF THE blanket. (Ex. The Dougherty Family or Individual Family Names)
• Each Square has a $ value attached:
• $1,000, $200, $100, $50, $25, $10, $5
• As we piece the squares together into its quilting pattern, we will photo & video document the progression during the IVF Journey.
Here’s an Up To Date Timeline of Mysti’s medical history and our TTC turned IVF Journey:
2006-Arthritis 11th grade
•2008-Married & Military
•2014-Lapband Weight Loss Surgery & Lost Mysti’s Dad
•2016-January- Stopped Birth Control & “year of trying”
•June-PCSed to Texas.
•Actively TTC with Dr in Texas
•12 cycles total:
•8 TI with Trigger
Starting to suspect Endometriosis
•2019-WLS-Revision-Lapband switch RnY
•2020-Military Orders To Idaho.
• December 2020-Laprscopy
• Endo confirmed
• Dr removed what he was legally allowed to touch (reproductive only); told me I would need a specialist to remove the rest but I should be able to get pregnant and “to call him when I do.” RIGHT TUBE BLOCKED SUPPOSEDLY REMOVED TUBE (CONFIRMED 4.21.22 he just cut in half)
•2021-continued to TTC naturally
• February-6w post op appt- asked recommendations for endometriosis specialists and was told he doesn’t know and could just take this pill. But I wanted removal.
• April-2021-Pap Smear. Informed nurse i still was looking for endometriosis specialist because I didn’t want to “just” leave it inside me! Still received zero any help; “you should be able to get pregnant with what I removed, come back when you do”
• July-Hypoglycemia Diagnosis-(RnY long term complication)
•January1.25.22-ER visit for pelvic pain
• “chocolate cyst confirms huge on my bladder”
• OBGYN follow up-told me to take Tylenol and ibuprofen & Orlissa to suppress the medications. Again I ask for help to remove the endo not suppress it. Told once the orlissa suppressed it and keep TTC.
• Found Endo specialist that does Deep Tissue Excision in Washington State.
•February-Endo Consult-needed to gain weight in order to have surgery.
•March-99lbs, Feeding Tube Placed, clogged a week later and ER could not replace it. Had it removed.
April 21, 2022: Deep Tissue Excision Surgery:
10 hour long surgery
• Left Fallopian tube removed
• Found the right one was just cut never actually removed so she took that out
• took appendix out
• 2 doctors co-worked on me and said it was like an explosion in there.
• Intestine were covered like polka dots all got removed
• She got 95% out
• Everything that was removed was sent to pathology
• Cysts removed from ovaries
• SAVE all reproductive organs except the Fallopian tubes. IVF is now required!!!!
• Removed numerous adhesions and past infectious stuff
• What we thought was 15cm endometrium sitting on my bladder might actually not be endo, it looked like an abscess that it’s walls harden and held the infection inside (but every week it was growing) this was sent to pathology as well
• 6inch bowel resection was required
• Ileostomy bag for now and will hopefully have surgery to reconnect in 6weeks-5months
• 11 incisions include internal pain pump for 5-7 days post op.
• She verified no endo in diaphragm (yay because this could have made thing 100x worse)
• We also have to stay in Washington 2 weeks post op cause that’s when most complications happens.
• July-Officially requested Medical Reassignment from Idaho.
• September-Temporary Ileostomy Reversal Surgery 3 day hospital stay and 3+ month recovery.
• October 24-3 base denials-Orders to Nellis
• Immediately spent 3 weeks starting at IVF clinics Statistics rates.
• November-Initial referral to clinic in LV.
October 24, 2022- Medical Reassignment Approved-Nellis AFB, Las Vegas, NV
November 1, 2022-Initial referral to clinic in LV.
December 1, 2022-Initial Consult with NFC & LV house hunting trip.
• Bobby: Genetic Carrier Screening ($100 Cash)-Completed
• 1.23-Mysti: Pre-Conception Labs- Completed
• 1.25-PCSed to Vegas
• 2.7-Bobby: Pre-Conception Labs- Completed
• 2.9- Mysti: Genetic Carrier Screening-Completed-$300
• 2.10- Sign Contract/Quotes-Completed
• 3/10- SIS: Saline Ultrasound-$375
• 3/18- Last Appt to discuss the Tentative Plan for upcoming Egg Retrieval and following Embryo Transfer and Medication list/timeline/schedule.
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Mysti Adams is organizing this fundraiser.